I looked at the mirror this morning and I almost wanted to cry ... My face was sick pale, my skin looked dry, and my eye-lids were half-closed (literally ptosis as if I had Horner's Syndrome)...slight fever, with nothing in the stomach but Soda (my natural amphetamine) for literally the past 3 days...what did I get myself into? I was very nauseous and about to vomit..my whole body started failing me when I needed it the most...I needed strength and I needed confidence to get myself up and go on with the day..as I was stepping out of the house, my heart couldn't stop beating...I couldn't control my body...I just couldn't.
Although I love the challenge but sometimes I just want to say F**** it I am done with this, I want my normal life back.
....but I am trying to survive....I just hope my body doesn't fail me for the last week of this term.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
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